Thursday, May 13, 2010

Some days you just never forget!

I was seven years old when JFK was assassinated. I remember my desk and where I sat when my third grade teacher, in shock, told her class the news. I was thirteen when man stepped on the moon and made history in space. We were camping at Wagon Wheel and the camping facility had a barn with a television in it. I remember it was mounted up high on the wall. For a time the swimming pool was empty, no one was sitting around a campfire, cars went silent. Everybody gathered in that barn to view a small step for man and a giant leap for mankind.

I was seventeen when my dad loaded the family to take me to Bible college! In a station wagon and lots of belongings, we drove from Mansfield, PA to East Providence, RI. I remember as if it were yesterday where I stood in line to register and then to purchase my books. I was twenty nine when AGWM sent a representative to our home in Walpole, MA to do a "home visit" to see if we were people that AGWM would invest in for missionary service. I remember details about that day that make me laugh twenty five years later.

I was thirty four when I delivered my precious firstborn. The doctor and the nurses, the food, the hospital environment, my epidural headache, all of the experience is like a video camera in my mind.

There are just some days you can never forget and then there are days that you wish you could forget and just can't. Some things happen in life that trip you up for a lifetime. There are days that are so mind boggling that you wonder where did I go wrong and what did I do to deserve this.

Five years ago today was one. May 13, 2005. I am not superstitious, however, it was on a Friday. Friday the 13th! One of those days that I wish had never happened but it did. May 13th is not a happy day for me nor are there any pleasant camera shots from that day. But today on my fifth anniversary from being devastated I have learned some truths that weigh in on my thinking.

1. Before making any move, whether lofty and idealistic or normal and average, count the cost.
2. Hurting people hurt people, wounded people wound people, and healing people heal people.
3. There are very few people you can trust.
4. Keep your life simple (uncomplicated), others will come along to complicate.
5. Beware of people who keep lists of wrongs, their perfection leaves no room for you.
6. People are quick to say, God has something better, not so. Some things are just evil.
7. When in desperate times, all you have is the love of your family and the closeness of HIS word. Rest in it.
8. Rely upon the divine healing of the Creator.
9. Make His love the music of your heart.
10. Forgiveness is a choice. Go from strength to strength.
11. Make peace with your past so it doesn't spoil your present.

Today, five years later, there is one thing that means the world to me and that is kindness. Although kindness is a thought, a motive, a feeling, kindness is also a verb.

In my darkest of days, when someone, I knew or didn't know, was kind to me I melted. It was as though my heart was in their grasp. It was as if Jesus himself was using that person to minister health into my broken spirit.

Some things in life just aren't fair but as the author wrote, GOD is.God is too wise to be mistaken. God is too good to be unkind. So when I don't understand, When I don't see His plan or when I can't trace His hand, I will trust HIS heart.

So I thank you Jesus that I have never left your love and you haven't left me. In the darkest of days or the brightest of glorious moments you are there. I thank you that after five years I am still standing, still loving you and still showing people kindness like they have shown me. I celebrate you today Lord, not the experience but only YOU.


  1. Debbie,

    Thank you for sharing that. I, too, remember the day JFK was assassinated and I remember the 1969 Moon landing. And, like you, I've had my own "May 13". For ME it was not a May 13 LITERALLY, but it's my own horrific date earlier this year. Your advice is wise and helpful. And seeing "where you're at" now spiritually, geographically, and in so many other categories, gives me hope today.
    You may remember Rev. Jim Spence who used to be Chaplain at Walpole prison. Jim says, "Unless a speaker has SUFFERED, he really has nothing to say to me." I agree with Jim. I'm sorry you have suffered, but you have a lot to say!

  2. I'm with you on this, especially your #s 3 and 6; things I've been saying for a long time. And indeed, forgiveness is a choice. It is not a reaction, or goods earned after apology. Forgiveness is its own decision. Those reluctant to forgive turn into your #5, and are often the ones most likely to hurt you next. Hard as it is, if we don't forgive, neither will God forgive us.

    And kindness is a verb, a state of being ("be ye kind" Paul says). Kindness doesn't mean niceties for niceness sake. It literally means you treat people the way you would treat your family, like we are the same. Being "kind" is like saying we are of the same kind, in the same language as Genesis, you know, "birds according to their kind", etc. So yes, let's all be kind, for we are kindred.

  3. I just found your blogspot and I'm so glad I did. Tears came to my eyes when I read this last posting. I loved all the others as well, but this one touched my heart, especially when I saw the picture of you with the two Honor Stars. How well, I remember that day. You have been on my mind the last few days, so I was so excited when I found out where you were. I don't like losing touch with special friends. God Bless You. I still have the same email so when you get a chance send me a note.